With our wood floor
remodeling near completion, my wife Patty and I have spent a great deal of time
moving furniture, tossing possessions we’ve saved over the years and generally
“decluttering.” The wood floors make our rooms look larger, or perhaps it’s merely
the fact that we have less stuff.
At first, Patty didn’t seem
too wild about my blueprints for redesigning the rooms once wood floors
replaced the old carpet. But she eventually got into the spirit of things and
we went back and forth about what would go best where. We didn’t argue; we
discussed, calmly.
Patty made a big concession
in moving her treadmill from a prominent place in the living room into a spare
bedroom. I permitted her to move the stereo to the other side of the living
room when it became apparent that speaker wires would become entangled every
time she sat in her recliner.
And that is symbolic of why
our marriage has lasted for 34 years. Neither of us insists on having our own
way, even if we truly believe we are right. Inflexibility only leads to petty
selfishness, that gradually veers to disrespect and ultimately delusion about
matrimony itself.
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